A short while back I tracked down and reviewed here an obscure little 70s horror/sex flick entitled Voices of Desire, the main reason I cited being the Sandra Cassell mystery. Beautiful star of Craven's Last House On The Left, some supposed relation of hers took to IMDb to insist she only ever made that classic picture, ruling out any possibility that she starred in 'porn'.
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| Cassell in Teenage Hitchhikers (left) and Last House on the Left (right) |
However, if one thing can be validated in the supposed relative's argument, it's that Sandra didn't do porn. True, there are a couple of her credits I am yet to see, but so far I have seen her participate in traditional simulated movie sex and a couple of nude rollarounds with other females. This isn't porn. Not in the 70s and certainly not today. If it's Sandra's dignity and modesty that feels threatened, I see nothing to be ashamed of.
Teenage Hitchhikers is a fun and silly sex comedy flick that's deliberately stupid. It gets off to a folksy start, with Mouse (Kathy Christopher) and Bird (Sandra Cassell/Peabody) hitching a ride in a band's RV. When naked groupies start almost literally appearing from the woodwork and telling the girls "if you wanna ride, you gotta slide", the girls decide that this is their stop, though Bird is a little more enthusiastic about groupiedom than her friend. The girls complain that people only ever want one thing, and so decide to stop being victims and take for once.
And so the girls start putting out in silly, raunchy manners like doing a striptease in a diner and giving a salesman the sexual runaround in a used car lot. Then they take the guys' money and carry on. There is a particularly amusing scene in which the girls hitch a ride with a ladieswear salesman, who invites them to help themselves to his merchandise. So they dress up in negligees and hop on his cock, but are promptly pulled over, inciting a cheeky Some Like It Hot-style routine. Saving to get a car and eventually to be "goin' strong by summer", the girls are on a roll.
The movie takes a darkly hilarious turn when a third girl is introduced. She is being chased down by some dodgy geezer, and so the girls put into practise their patent-pending defence techniques. Bird strips off and wraps herself around a nearby tree with a book in her hand, and nonchalantly criticises the attacker's technique whilst munching on an apple. His masculinity takes a knock, and he gets up and fights his corner. He even convinces Bird to let him 'rape' her to prove his capability. Alas, she deems him unsatisfactory, and Mouse suggests, "Maybe rape just ain't your thing." Defeated, the guy allows the girls to 'rape' him in return, to show him how it's done. So when he's bound and naked, they take his victim off with them and leave him in the lurch.
Having participated in an aforementioned romp with a used car salesman, the girls head off with his best motor, one of those sweet slick convertibles. This seemed about the extent of their ambition, so from here on in, they relax, take it slow, and let the good times roll. Pulling over for a couple of thumbing hippies in possession of a robust ganja supply, the crew head on over to a swingers party organised by a cute camp dude. There they work themselves into a room patchworked with people screwing, and have tons of fun with their legs in the air whilst gleefully blowing gum-bubbles (that's GUM, you sickos!) in the faces of their lovers.
This orgy scene is obviously the 'money shot' of the production. It appears to be real to me. Each of the couples we see have a real chemistry and seem happy and comfortable. Moreover, the long wild hairstyles of the '70s, on the heads, the faces and the crotches, allow for real sex to be taking place without any genitals being seen. It seems like a really great compromise. It's not so explicit to be classified as porn, but it has the sensual realism that exaggerated movie sex is usually tragically lacking in.
Of course, with their funky clothes noticeably absent, and the only other possible hiding places for a roll of cash positively occupied by shaggy beardy dudes, the girls find themselves distracted away from their hard earned savings, and the hippie girl they came with steals their wad and legs it. Their rescued rape victim reunites with her long-lost boyfriend and happily fucks off into the sunset with him. When Mouse and Bird awake after an awesome night, they find themselves down one companion and several thousand dollars, and back to Square One.
Teenage Hitchhikers is quite a lot of fun. For Sandra Cassell, it's an interesting change from her meek, victimised roles of Mari and Anna. Bird is sassy and outgoing, and the most adventurous of the girls. Mouse is vibrant and energetic, and they make a very amusing pair. It's another of those little gems that is completely of its time, and feels like a little time capsule in itself. The girls have those terrible bikini-shaped tan marks, and oversized Casey Jones hats, and big white underwear yet still look quite sexy. It's a cheesy, quirky load of fun. Good stuff!
